Comments on: ★ Don’t Call Me Mr. Mom

By: Dorie Morgan’s Rising Up » A Very Romantic Rising Up Valentine’s Day » Navigating Twenty-Something Suburban Life

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 11:25:40 +0000

[...] chip macadamia nut cookies… they are amazing). It really doesn’t matter what we make though. It is the time together that really matters and playing in the kitchen is a fun way to enjoy each other’s company with the TV [...]

By: Evan

Evan — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 16:39:49 +0000

Did my email bring these feelings up? Is it alright if I call myself “Mr. Mom” or does that not fly either?

By: Todd Hiestand » Blog Archive » Sunday Blog Roundup: April 26 - May 3 - Missional Living in Suburban America

Mon, 05 May 2008 03:21:58 +0000

[...] Don’t Call Me Mr. Mom – I am not Mr. mom. I am a dad. [...]

By: Dorie

Dorie — Fri, 02 May 2008 11:05:54 +0000

@ Pat – Your comment just reminded me how much I take for granted as far as my own family dynamic. My grandfather never changed my mother’s diaper but by the time I had been born, he decided that he wanted a “shadow” and was my primary care giver until I was eight (diaper changing and all).

I’m also reminded of conversations I had with my husband before we were married (where my micromanaging self outlined my parenting expectations for when we have kids). One of my biggest concerns was that he would be a hands off parent.

By: Pat

Pat — Fri, 02 May 2008 02:01:16 +0000

It’s not that many years since guys just weren’t expected to be involved in child rearing, except for being the disciplinarians. My dad never changed a diaper – and certainly not my grandpa. But for me, … the whole world is different.

They times, they have a’changed.

By: Todd

Todd — Thu, 01 May 2008 23:35:58 +0000

Dorie, yeah i guess they would call Melanie Mrs. Dad when she goes to work…er something. It’s funny, people don’t even think anything by it. They aren’t trying to be sexist. It’s just their default way of thinking from how the culture has brought them up. And that’s just the problem. Far too often we don’t recognize how our culture is infecting our view of life, both in good ways and, in this case, unhelpful ways.

Aaron, i think you are right, its situational for sure. I know some dad’s who are home five days a week. That’s pretty cool. I don’t know that I would do well with that but I think its great.

By: Aaron

Aaron — Thu, 01 May 2008 21:04:14 +0000

Amen. It really is a messed up way of looking at manhood and womanhood. The parental role falls to both people in a proportion that the couple deems fit for their situation. So Amen again.

By: Dorie

Dorie — Thu, 01 May 2008 19:11:36 +0000

The “Mr. Mom” comment never would have crossed my mind. Although for me, this begs the question: Do the people who call you “Mr. Mom” also call Mel “Mrs. Dad”? And if so, does that comment only happen on Thursdays? I would think it would have to go both ways.

Despite the fact that many of us desperately crave a blended life, we don’t quite know what to do with it when we see others in our community have that blended life. The SAHD situation is an unfortunate side effect of “Men’s Lib” not being caught up with “Women’s Lib” and eventually (I hope) we will get to a “People’s Lib” (and forget about the other two).

By: Todd

Todd — Thu, 01 May 2008 19:10:54 +0000

Shanna, my blog goes to the whole world.. so there ya go…

Pat, i have gained an enormous amount of respect for my wife recently. I can’t believe she does this everyday. I mean, I love it… but if it were everyday i might go insane…

By: Pat

Pat — Thu, 01 May 2008 14:42:01 +0000

Totally with you on this one! When I was doing the first few years of our church plant I was stay-home dad for Kaileigh in the mornings, then would go do “pastor stuff” in the afternoons. I loved it, but lots of moms – working moms especially – had a really hard time describing what I did in what I considered reasonable terms.

I’m just being a dad.