I am a pastor at 
In my recent post on “The Mob” I tried to bring out the idea that we need to always be aware and thinking thinking critically about our way of life. We need to constantly be allowing God, mostly through the scriptures and through prayer, reorient and reconvert our way of life. I believe this is especially true for those of us who live in Suburban America. We live extremely individualized, consumerized, busy and disconnected lives (just to name a few). Without paying attention to our way of life, we’ll more than likely just go about our culture’s default life without even realizing it.
With this in mind, I’ve been reading around the topic of the Rule of St. Benedict. I’m curious about the connection between a healthy suburban spirituality and the monastic way of life. My big question is, “what would it look like to have a suburban rule of life?”
What I don’t want is a prescriptive list of requirements and duties that someone must perform. This is what frustrates me and most other people about organized religion. Often the word “rule” can be construed in that way. But, really the term “rule” (regula) is more better defined as a “guidepost” or “railing.” What I like about Benedicitine Spirituality is this is the focus. Joan Chittister writes,
“The rule of Benedict is more wisdom than law. The Rule of Benedict is not a list of directives. The Rule of benedict is a way of life. And that’s the key to understanding the Rule. It isn’t one.”
The thing I like about the Rule of Benedict is also that it is not about getting out of the world and isolating yourself from reality so you can focus on God. Rather, it is about living well and aware in the daily.
Chittister writes again in the book Wisdom Distilled from the Daily: Living the Rule of St. Benedict Today
“Spirituality is the way in which we express a living faith in a real world. Spirituality is the sum total of the attitudes and actions that define our faith” and later she writes, the Rule of St. Benedict is designed for ordinary people who live ordinary lives.”
Later she writes a paragraph that cuts right into the typical suburban christian’s way of life,
“Today, too, people go faithful from church to neighborhood week after week and, then, between times give themselves entirely to making money, and being nationalistic, and having fun. In the meantime, Lazarus again waits hungry for the Christians of this time to notice his deprivation and stoop down to listen to him as the Lazarus of the gospel story waited in vain for help from the wealthy and pious…”
We are all guilty of being so caught up in a default way of life that isn’t out rightly evil, but is destroying our souls and our witness. What we need is to fashion a way of life that is contstantly reminding us to be present to the moment in front of us, be presetn to the person in front of us, remind us that we are part of the People of God who are here as witnesses to a risen Messiah.
I’m finding that the Rule of St. Benedict is a good teacher for me as I seek to live life more aware of my/our calling…
I am reading this book by Chittister (which I highly recommend. On Tim Keel’s recommendation I am also reading a book called A Good Life: Benedict’s Guide to Everyday Joy
by Robert Benson a second time and we’re actually reading this book together at the leadership team retreat we have this weekend. And, finally, I figured I would go to the source and I picked up a copy of Rule of Saint Benedict in English
Any thoughts on a suburban rule?
carol h said...
1I have been reading/studying the book “Sacred Rhythms” by myself and in community with others. Ruth Barton talks about developing a rule of life. – not a set of rules, but answering the question, “what disciplines do i need in my life so i can be the person God created me to be.” and the book hs helped me develop disciplines that have changed my life.
as such i have been slowly over time developing what than means for me.
thanks for sharing the book you are reading…i think i would like to read that next.
the woman who leads my spiritual formation group trained with bruce demarest and the bendictines. what i have been learning is life changing.
02/2/09 12:36 PM | Comment Link
Beth said...
2I’ve been going back to Benedictine stuff recently after a period of focusing on it in the mid-90s, and it is as relevant as ever. I think what I would say to the comment about what it would look like to have a suburban rule, might be that everyone already has a Rule of Life. We all do many things “as a rule” — some suburban people’s Rule of Life is to watch 3 hours of TV every night, to eat fast food 4 times a week, to engage with God for 55 minutes on Sunday, to make sure the kids are always at soccer practice, to read every issue of O, etc. The question is whether your de facto Rule lines up with, and is shaping you into, what you say you want to be.
That said, I’d also probably want to give the *corporate* nature of Benedict’s spirituality a shout-out. That, and not the notion of having intentional regularity in life, is the really radical, transformational, countercultural part for contemporary Americans.
02/2/09 6:04 PM | Comment Link
benson said...
3this is good stuff todd. i like the Chittister quote.
have you heard of this book? http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/083083334X. it really rocked my world in terms of uncovering some of the unspoken and assumed rules that suburban living comes attached with.
02/2/09 8:39 PM | Comment Link
Jenn said...
4Just watched a great documentary on Thomas Merton (Soul Searching: the journey of Thomas Merton). Great person to study for more on monastic and contemplative life. There is something about living in a place of tension.
02/3/09 12:25 AM | Comment Link
Phil Whittall said...
5Good stuff Todd, some friends and I have been thinking about this for a while and we’ve come up with ‘Our Promise of Life’ to help us British suburbanites live intentionally but not necessarily bound to rules.
Promise of Life
Because life is a gift, we live it thankfully
Savour what we have
Pray for what we need.
No longer hurried, distracted, or worried,
We’ll walk through each moment with God.
Because everything is a gift, we live with open hands,
Tread lightly on the earth
Share freely our homes and our things.
No longer restlessly chasing identity,
We’ll be known by our love not our logos.
Because giving is a gift we live generously,
Give ourselves deeply to family and community,
Give joyfully to those in need.
No longer caught in the consumer dream
We’ll invest our all in the kingdom of love.
We’re trying to remember our values and live them on a daily basis…
02/3/09 6:46 AM | Comment Link
Todd said...
6Phil, this is really cool. Of course, I have questions.
Have you found that it is specific enough to be helpful and general enough to find freedom? How do you guys help each other live this out well? What was the process like to create this?
02/3/09 10:37 AM | Comment Link
Todd said...
7Benson, yeah that book was really helpful. Al actually came out to The Well to speak on the topic on a Saturday last August. You can hear the audio here if you are interested.
http://church.thewellpa.com/podcast/the-church-in-suburbia-audio/
02/3/09 10:39 AM | Comment Link
Phil Whittall said...
8Well that’s the challenge – specific but general. To be honest we’ll see if we’ve got it right, at the moment the responsibility is with me not the rule to make it specific and I think that’s right but there is a basis to which I can be called back to. Because the people who are also making this promise are friends as we talk about life we bring this into it and so it begins to permeate life. We’ve been doing that accidentally and this just helps us have some focus to what we we’re already doing.
The process was a couple of years of conversation and thinking and then challenging two guys to actually write something, which we then sent round, prayed and decided to go for. So pretty loose really.
02/3/09 3:08 PM | Comment Link
Bret said...
9Todd,
I think you are spot on – developing a Rule for suburban life is not only appropriate, it is needed. I found the chapter on developing a rule in Marjorie Thompson’s Soul Feast to be worth the price of the book.
In my experience, developing a Rule is less about rules than it is about cultivating rhythm. This is both the most difficult part and the greatest potential for blessing in our scattered, busy, idolatrous lifestyles.
02/5/09 6:01 PM | Comment Link
Tripp Hudgins said...
10Holy cow.
Thank you for this post. I’ve been trying to find a way to get my suburban congregation to embrace a rule. They so clearly want to, but they shy away from the religiosity of Benedict, for example.
I will keep reading your blog to see what I can see. Thank you for this post.
03/19/09 5:45 PM | Comment Link
Todd said...
11Tripp, I would love to hear how you guys process this as a community. Right now I am trying to wrap my mind around this personally. Actually, its not really my mind that is having a problem, its my life (lifestyle) that needs to figure this out.
I would really recommend Benson’s book as a great intro / conversation starter…
03/20/09 11:21 AM | Comment Link