Been thinking a lot about prayer lately. Not just because I don’t do it enough (which is definately the case!). But also, being completly honest, i more often then not don’t really feel like i am praying to God when i pray. it may sound heretical for a pastor to say this, but i know that a large percentage of the time when i pray (especially in groups) there are just words that are coming out of my mouth that “sound good.”
I have been challanged lately to really take time of prayer, especially when i am praying with a friend or a group of people, to take it very seriously and to not pray if i cannot truely comprehend that i am praying to the one and only Holy God. It been amazing, when i do this, and literally picture myself before the throne of God, coming to him, i have some of the more emotional and real times of prayer. I think it is a mindset thing where instead of going through a simple learned ritual, we engage our hearts as well as our minds and really connect with God on a real level.
We hear a lot that our prayer is so dry. When i pray to God, and picture myself before His throne and cry out to him and be completly honest before him, it makes all the difference.
this honesty is so refreshing. How often we are fake and don’t really tell God what we are feeling. Take a look at Psalm 13 and you see David almost getting pissed at God. in a beautiful progression we see him go from dispair to comfort. that is what prayer should do. I know i need to be so much more honest with God, tell him what i feel, and engage my heart. Not just say and do what i have learned all my life i was supposed to “do” and “say” when i pray.
Also, i need to stop trying to sound “holy” and “spiritual” when i pray with others…now there is a challange!